The gift of light

The gift of light will appear when you take in the fear. 

Impeccable

"When you are impeccable you take reaponsibility for your actions, but you don't judge or blame yourself."

Don Miguel Ruiz

Life will break you

"Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won't either because solitude will break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed ot left or hurt or death brushes near let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you wasted as many as you can."

     

Louise Erdrich

From the Talking  Drum

we danced

and we danced...

we danced scattering our seeds into the ground, ploughing and turning it anew, breeding life in the womb of the Earth.

We danced to shed our old skin and make space for the new, we danced to face our inner, darker self and love it as our own child.

We dropped into the feet and into the mud, rooting our bodies and binding ourselves to this earth to this time.

We jumped with the rhythm of spring,  we laughed and we danced from flower to flower, from moment to moment, carrying the breath of creation.

we spread our wings and we flew over and over the beautiful earth, finding our family and celebrating new connections, painting new horizons and singing new songs... we danced, the crazy rhythms of  beautiful children..

We danced through new moons and full moons, we danced through the summer, spreading our fire and stumping our feet, reeking havoc

We lost sense of time, sense of space, sense of ourselves , we lost our separatenenss and became one with the rhythm of drum

thump, thump, thump, we dropped into the breath, into the hips, into the fire of the womb, the chaos... we became everything and nothing and we danced and we danced well into the night underneath the moon, spilling our anguish, our agony, our tears and our blood into the Earth, making sure she will be fertile to bear offspring again, that she will create love out of pain..

Here we are at the treshold of the new beginning, the harvest, the rebirth, letting go of all the dance and listening only to the rhythm of our heart... slow and steady, nearing an end, letting go of all that no longer serves and readying ourselves for rebirth, reliving all the joy and the sorrow, the tears and the laughter, the pain and the ecstasy.... letting flow in and flow out in an infinite cycle of life... we danced... feeling the softness, feeling the caress of the fall wind dance into our fingers and our hair... feeling the first chill, we braced for the long journey to come

Giving birth to our new selves- stronger, wiser, fuller, determined to dive into the darkness of winter again, knowing fully what we are to face and joyous with the challenge... we dance... we dance to create life again from nothing, to flower from  the dirt, to shine light from the darkness, not only to dance but to sing, for we have found our song, our heart, our calling... and we dance... 

we dance into circles, spinning waves of light, waves of love, waves of chaos and creation, eternally grateful, eternally blossoming into the night, endlessly creating life only to face Death again  and be reborn,  again and again... an infinite dance with the cycle of life...

Let dissolve

The only suffeing comes from attachment. 

Atrachment to things, to people, to relationships, to ideas. 

Attachment to our personality, to who we think we are, to our separate identity.

To let dissolve, to melt into nothingness, and become one with the Universe is the most challenging and most rewarding journey we will ever undertake. 

The choice

Are we leading our lives or simply floating along like a leaf blown by the wind?

Have we taken charge of our destiny or are we waiting for one thing or another to happen?

Does the feeling of being stuck overwhelm , while we keep pushing the blame from one side to another refusing to look at ourselves and take responsibility for our actions.

Isn't time to stand up, dust off and take charge?
Stop pointing fingers at others judging, blaming and assuming and take a good look at what we do.

It's a hard truth to face the ugliness of our own existence, but it is there just as anyone else's.
May be we have given into the tide just because it's too hard to take a stand and swim against the current.
We put up with words and actions simply not to confront.
We put up with our own words and actions simply our of habit!

We blame the system but we are still a part of the system.

Everything in life is a choice.
Choosing to believe that there is another option and we can stand up and make our own destiny is the first choice we need to make.

Not-Beautiful

"If it is love we are making, even though we are apprehensive or frightened, we are willing to untangle the bones of Death nature.  We are willing to touch the not- beautiful in another, in ourselves. Behind this challenge is a cunning test from the Self. "

"What is the not- beautiful? Our own secret hunger to be loved is the not beautiful. Our disuse and misuse of love is the not- beautiful. Our dereliction in loyalty and devotion is unlovely, our sense of soul- separateness is homely, our psychological warts, inadequacies, misunderstandings, and infantile fantasies are the not -beautiful. Additionally, the Life/Death/Life  nature, which births, destroys, incubates and birthd again is considered the not- beautiful. "

Clarissa Pinkola Estes

Women Who Run With the Wolves. 

Can you feel it?

Can you feel it?

The spring in your step, the tingling in your fingertips...

It's the song bubbling in your breath, the smile hanging off the corner of your lips. 

It's in the tear gently caressing your cheek, not sure if it's a tear of sadness or joy. 

Can you feel the butterflies dancing in your gut, making wind with their glorious wings. Wind, pregnant with the all the unknown that is to be!

Can you feel it?

It's the flame getting stronger and stronger at the root of your being. 

It hurts to stay the same, it hurts to hold back the power...

It hurts not to spread your wings and let the wind carry you. 

It burns to try and deny the fire in your belly. 

It brings tears to your eyes when you hold your breath desperately fighting to silence song of your heart!

 Angry shocks run up and down your spine at the mere thought of fear, for what is fear but a weak denial to all that is!

Throw it out, for it no longer serves a purpose, as if it ever did!

Feel deep in your heart for what you know is already here. 

Your soul is no longer laying on the dusty floor of your being, buried under dirty  reasons and half realized fears. 

It is awake and storming out. 

 

It doesn't need to fight or break out, for in its gaze the impertinence of the blind   illusions simply melts, the fears simmer to ash and logic vanishes into thin air without even a "puff". 

Your soul is simply stepping out in all its glory and fire! 

To deny it, to fight it is to die a slow and painful death. 

Let it dance with the Wind and send Thunder in the sky! 

You know it is time to step into your power and march with the change. 

Anything less is hell. 

You can feel it with every fiber in your body, your can smell it with every sip of breath.... 

Why are you fighting it?

Let the fire in you blow up  into an eternal blaze, no need to fear it, no need to control it. 

The only way the fire won't consume you is to become the Fire...

The Ancient force in us

The old vibrations of struggle no longer bring results, in fact they never did but we were to blind to see. 

The warrior mode is no longer enough. 

The fighter is just one aspect of us and that is no longer enough. 

Dig deeper, look into the deepest, darkest vortex of the soul to find its counterpart- the Priestess, the Goddess, the Magician. 

We all have it, we just put those aspects of us on the side so we can bear the hardship of life. 

Well, bearing is no longer enough!

We now need to rise above the mundane and find our song, find our joy, find our ecstasy! 

Marry the warrior and the goddess in one- our true self, inseparable from the universe!

The two counterparts, the opposites, the twin flames, they are not without, they are within, waiting for eons and eons to be united. 

Find that soft, gentle, yet powerful force in us, that knows, that feels, that summons, that runs wild. 

Summon the Mother within, the Ancient one, the Wise one, that incredible force that has been dormant for too long. 

And let the warrior hang his sword, rest his sorrow on the her shoulder and weep rivers of pain for what he has seen. 

And when the anguish is gone, he can see his clear reflection in her, for they are one and the same, all within us and all around us. 

Change hurts

Change can be the most uncomfortable feeling
It is like trying to fit and look good into clothes that are very outdated.
You are twisting and squeezing and pulling and fighting trying so hard to be what you used to be.
But why?
Why is metamorphosis so painful?
Because we cling to our own perception of ourselves.
Because we are so attached to the idea of what we are.
"The most important thing is to be able at any given moment what we are for what we can become" Maharishi Majesh Yogi
The caterpillar doesn't resist becoming a butterfly.
The snake gladly removes its old skin to make space for a new one.
Even we throw out old clothes to make room to grow

Why are we so unwilling to do it with the things that really need changing?
Our outdated habits, old ideas of what we are and the people around us are?

We need to make space, to throw out the old and have fun with the new.
It is scary at first, but soon you forget the fear and become attached to that new you, only to resist the next change, lurking around the corner.

Fear

Fear is simply a reaction to the unknown. 

Take a deep breath and dive into it

Trust

Before we can trust another we need to learn to trust ourselves. 

Sun Song

Rise, little Sun, Rise

Bathe me in your glorious light

Shine, little Heart, shine

Bathe me in my glorious light

Come, little Wave, come

Play with my soul

Giude, little Bird, guide

Guide me your beautiful song

Fly, little Butrerfly, fly

Carry me in the wind

Mourn, little Moon, mourn

Burry me with old bones

Rise, little Flame, rise

Let me be reborn!

Can you stand in the darkness

Can you stand in the darkness

Deep in the void

Can you feel the empty space around

And cherish its liberating embrace. 

Can you sit with the emptiness

And resist

The desire to be full again. 

Exploring the sharp edges 

Of your true self

Learning to love the deep black holes.  

Can you feel the empty walls of your being

Simply the thud of your heart

Giving life to the universe. 

Can you see the abandoned corners 

With stale marks 

Of the unnecessary gone

Exhaling all that is old 

Feeling death in your veins

Can you wait for a breath 

Before you start filling up again

Can you wait and feel 

For direction

For sign

For a song

To bring you back to life. 

Can you sit with the void,

This vortex of nothingness

Not taking the first step

Waiting instead

For the path to call upon you

Can you stand the darkness

Sit in the silence

Drowning in stillness

Gasping for light

And really feel

your feet on the ground

The Flame

You don't have to be afraid of it

You can't resist it any longer

You mustn't surrender to it

And then mourn it as a weakness. 

Let go of the resistance

Let go of the control

Step into rapture and 

Burn

You have the ultimate power. 

You won't be extinguished

You won't dissolve

You won't loose yourself

You will step into your true power

You won't burn

You won't be hurt

Fear will no longer exist

And loneliness will be a long lost friend

Embrace the fire

You are the flame

You are the power.